5 Reasons Why I’ll Never Be Lance Armstrong…

…among many others.

1. I cannot, for the life of me, maneuver my bike through doorways with any kind of grace. You should see me try to get out of the bike shop every day after work.

2. I have cuts and bruises on my calves from the pedals hitting me when I walk my bike (for reals).

3. I still go wonkily side to side every time I start pedaling after a stoplight.

4. I can’t bike one handed – it’s all I can do to make hand signals without flying into oblivion.

5. I can’t pedal off the seat. I can do it in spin, but forget about it on a real bike.

Don’t you totally want to meet me on the road?! At least I wear a helmet and I go at a grandma pace and now I have a shiny new bike that has good brakes. Safety first!

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