Project 365 Fail

So I didn’t take any photos this week…I just couldn’t get it together. BUT, I already renewed my commitment and took a photo for today, so next week we’ll be back on track.

As I don’t have any photos, I thought I’d share some reflections on each day. The weekend started out with a retreat that I’ve been planning since October with a group of people that I’d only met via phone and email.

Overcome with nerves, I wonder if eight months of long distance work with a large group will culminate in success. Can connections and intimacy be fostered after a few short hours of ice breakers and casual conversation? Apparently, yes. This leads me to believe online dating could be even more successful if they did team building exercises on the first date.

A 2 am bedtime means I am not awake for the planned walk/run/hike but I make it out of bed in time to make two trips to the breakfast buffet. The day moves along glitch-free; people are connections, friendships are forming, and information is being shared. More people go out of their way to thank each other than I have ever seen and it does wonderful things for morale…and inspires me to read a poem in front of a group I just met. The day ends perfectly with Alex and I crowding a twin bed and drifting off.

We close the retreat with an activity that makes me seriously evaluate my current circumstances; we are to imagine ourselves in fifteen years and converse as if we are actually that person. Apparently, in fifteen years I am running a CSA out of an urban farm, teaching yoga, and writing. I better get busy.

The weekend end with me and ten of my new friends eating ice cream in my living room while watching President Obama speak on Osama Bin Laden – a bittersweet moment in a few respects.

Waking up is not the easiest thing I’ve ever done. Ater a long and emotional weekend, work doesn’t sound appealing. But once I’m pedaling into the sunrise, dread turns to anticipation and the day flies by. A nap in the sun on my lunch break does wonders. After an impromptu meeting after work with a different set of amazing people, I fall into bed and into dreams immediately.

After day two of the week, I am ready for another weekend. A lunch date with Alex, who takes the train down just to see me, takes the edge off. A date with the DVR after work includes watching Steve Carrell’s last episode of the office, which makes me cry. Instead of begrudging my tendency toward strong emotions, I embrace sensitivity, get a hug, and go to bed.

An early morning gym visit gives me energy for the day and when I don’t recognize the guy at the front counter, makes me reconsider my gym membership. I wear black jeans to work and it ends up being 90 degrees. I embrace my reptilian instincts when the air conditioning is broken on my train car and the heater is running instead. I get home hot and sweaty, and end the day with sliders and a salad.

Almost the weekend; I’ve been running on autopilot this week – not quite recovered. I am missing my core group – it’s been too long – and they always help me recharge. The night ends when I indulge in one of my few eco un-friendly needs: ultra-chemical hair dye to cover the greys. After 40 minutes and some inhaled ammonia, my hair is a lovely shade of brown, with some lovely grey highlights. I sigh in resignation – I know when I’ve lost – and accept my genetic disposition towards look extra wise.


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